My cat is momentarily favoring me. He seems to be my lover or familiar. I am so alone in this vast world, universe. Just so much dust. Maybe I’m feeling sorry for myself, especially because my cat wants my sole attention and as I am allergic to his dander, I can’t pet him for too long.
The irony of all this is I have been getting attention from male species lately after 20 years and I’m not interested in any of them hell, my 1st husband from 38 yrs ago wanted to come visit but as he has a wife, I didn’t go for the idea. I didn’t like it when he had an affair when we were married and would never do that to another woman. I have a very small peer group and not one member of my family – immediate or extended – don’t read my stuff. I write in a newsletter for a Bipolar clubhouse and my church and rarely get a response. My sister will be sitting next to me reading the church n/l and not say a word to me – Somehow I feel that sucks.
Anyway, it might be a manifestation of Winter Blues (though I doubt it), or being bi-polar II, or being such a private person, but I feel incredibly alone.
Guess I just needed to put it out there even though it doesn’t matter much and is certainly not great literature.