Independence

Being a Caregiver means slipping in and out of people’s lives. You have moments of impact in long days where you are sometimes seen as an intruder. A person in declining abilities often has a strong, independent spirit. I applaud. Even though it is often harder to take care of them, they are still embracing life. They don’t want to give up the reins. 

I’m caring for a 92 year old woman who gets up before I arrive to wash and dress beforehand. She wants to do things herself. She doesn’t always like it when I clean because it bothers her that she can’t do it herself. I have to respect her feelings even when I know there is much to be done that her family requests.  

Contrast that with a woman who is a love but is dependent. When I wash her, she doesn’t lift a finger to help. Her family further supports her dependence by insisting she not act on her own and video monitors her every move.  She had a stroke but needs to push herself more because she is loosing her physical abilities.  

Independence is a vital key to a rewarding life. It can sometimes get in the way of reasonable care but you have to respect a person that is fighting to retain a self of self.  

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